It's bad enough that Claire's husband James left her the day he was at the birth of their first child -- I mean, if he thought it was going to upset him that much he should have just stayed at home -- but to rub salt into the episiotomy, he didn't even have the decency to leave her for someone skinny! He's just absconded, leaving Claire with a newborn baby, a broken heart, two extra stone and an ...er...birth canal ten times its normal size. In the...